How to Get Over Being Cheated On

06.05.2019

Why Women Cheat: a Fresh Approach

Here are the main reasons why women cheat on their men.

1) Lack of attention

Many guys don’t know why ladies cheat on them and even less of them know the essence of female loyalty, what lies behind it. A lady must feel unique, she must feel the love of her partner, she must be the only one her man loves, no ifs or buts about it. At first, when a girl's infidelity is simply irrelevant, a man barrages her with attention, all sorts of gifts, and he is ready to do anything for the sake of his woman. Yet it does not last long, some guys start cooling down after some time, some last for a year or so at best. However, it’s completely natural, it is typical for all alliances to get less exciting with time, love gets boring, and partners are no longer able to find anything interesting in each other.

But while it is completely natural, does it mean that women need less attention because of it? Nope. A lady wants to get back to that wonderful period of love, which makes her cheat on her husband.

2) Absence of interactions

Every relationship is not just about having sex and kissing each other, it is also about being the best of friends, it is about having someone to rely on when the times get dark. Yet it is quite an unfortunate reality that many guys completely forget to interact with their women. They do not think that thanks to their actions, or rather lack of actions, the chance for an act of infidelity of a wife is becoming higher and higher.

An act of infidelity of a wife, the reasons for which lie in the lack of interactions with her husband, may start from just a basic conversation with a man that listens to her.

3) Lack of sex

It may surprise you, but for ladies, it’s not the physical component that is the most important in sex but the emotional one. How a man feels after being cheated on? It is hard, they may get quite aggressive and violent. How a woman feels after being cheated on? Well, it’s quite a lot more devastating to them, it’s all about emotional connection for them and, all of a sudden, it gets broken just like that.

Here’s a very common problem, guys tend to forget about the importance of interaction with their beloved women, they only think about the pleasures of the flesh without putting any meaning into them. So, here’s the ultimate reason for female infidelity for you, if a lady can no longer receive the pleasure of interactions, both physical and emotional, with her own husband – she will find another guy who is more competent in it.

4) Lack of presence

Girls, in general, do not like loneliness, the same goes for the state in which their heart and soul are tightly bound to one man that they love. Yes, most girls find it quite difficult to go through periods of separation with their husbands, and it doesn’t really matter whether they are working or just hanging out with their buddies. In this case, a woman starts thinking that her husband no longer needs her.

It doesn’t mean that a girl will do it with malicious intent, it may be just a natural reaction of her brain. If she doesn’t see her husband, if she is unable to interact with him – there will be someone to interact with. It’s not about making a statement or anything, it’s about habits, a lady has got used to marital life, and she now needs these interactions to feel complete and satisfied.

In the end, I would like to say that these points are not universal, we are all unique and we are all individuals, your relationship is probably quite different from mine, so be careful with the assumptions you make. Some ladies can easily handle a separation with a man, and some do not need sex at all.

How to Tell If You're Being Cheated On

1) Restriction of access to personal space

It was not so long ago when my wife carelessly threw her phone on the couch and asked me out of the shower, “Look, who's calling me there?” Or even asked me to answer the phone and told a person on the other end that she would give them a call. And suddenly she began to hide the phone, and she changed her passwords in social networks to those that I don’t know. This is an occasion to think about the possibility of infidelity, but at the same time, you should check some other signs. There may be different reasons for that, it may not have anything to do with cheating. If you’ve found out that there are no other signs to suspect her of infidelity, then it is worth apologizing to a spouse for inappropriate behavior towards her. If the access restriction still remains, then look for other signs before making a final verdict on whether you are being cheated on.

2) Abandonment of stable habits

How to tell if your girlfriend has cheated on you? Her habits may change. Let’s say a wife suddenly stopped attending a fitness room or, on the contrary, began to rush her way to it, although earlier she was completely indifferent to sports. Or did she suddenly acquire a passion for classical music or she attend music classes after work? At the same time, her spouse becomes suspicious, he began to worry a lot about the smallest of things. She often does not respond to calls and text messages, or maybe even turns off her phone completely. These are some serious signs that should make you question her loyalty. If a wife has nothing to hide, then she will always gladly and thoroughly answer your questions about fitness or music. Of course, it’s not a secret to anyone, that it’s not exactly comfortable to answer a phone call when you are working out. After a workout, the same characteristic breathing may be heard in the voice... as after rough sex. This can be a good disguise for an act of infidelity; thus, it can be one of the signs she cheated on you last night. But it’s not necessary to question her loyalty straight away. It would be more appropriate to ask why her classes suddenly became so “uninterruptable.”

3) Permanent delays at work without any warning

When a wife suddenly began to spend more time at work, it’s not necessarily a sign of infidelity. When management lays off a part of the staff, the remaining employees are simply given a hefty amount of work for a meager wage increase. If a spouse freely talks about the situation, and she seems genuine, then you can trust her. If a wife wants to achieve a promotion because she has got such a chance, she can also devote more time to her job duties. If there was no such thing, a woman is silent and does not want to admit why she constantly comes home late, then there is a reason to suspect her of cheating. Let’s now discuss a very important topic of how to move on after being cheated on.

How to Heal After Being Cheated On?

1. Accept your feelings

How to get over being cheated on? Please do not blame yourself for the fact that you cannot magically leave all of the things that happened in the past and live on as if nothing has happened. Your wife’s infidelity has probably become the greatest shock in your life at the moment, and it represents a serious threat to your well-being, but you must know that this is not the end. Yes, getting over being cheated on, but it’s not the first time that it happened to someone in this world. An act of cheating doesn’t mean that you are finished, and your partner is the worst person in the world, it means that your relationship has some issues that need to be resolved. You must know how being cheated on changes you and resist it.

2. Work on your thoughts

Many feelings arise as a result of our own thoughts. We tend to believe everything that our inner voice tells us to be the ultimate truth. However, it often exaggerates or connects events from various life situations to provide us with irrefutable evidence that life is over. How to deal with being cheated on? Your biggest enemy is your own head, and it is very important to be able to look at things from a different perspective, without making irrational assumptions.

3. Think about your memories and the things that they try to tell you

You remember an act of infidelity of your wife for a reason. Not because you are a bad person and are not able to forgive a partner or do not want to save your marriage. Most likely, it is because your feelings are trying to tell you that some issues remain unresolved and that your relationship needs to be given more attention. For example, your sex life has become too stale or your wife has continuous conflicts with your daughter, and you are forced to break them up. If you continue to ignore these alarm signals, your unconscious part of the psyche will send them back at you again and again.

But how to get over being cheated on and stay together? Is it even possible?

How to Forgive Someone Who Cheated on You?

Should I forgive my wife’s infidelity and give our relationship another shot? To begin with, distance yourself from all the bad thoughts. If you cannot go on a vacation, go fishing, visit or rent a hotel room for a week or two, try to keep a little mental distance from both your partner and your relationship, take time to think. A person is not able to make the right decision while they are under the pressure of their own emotions.

Try to look at what happened from an outside perspective. Get back to your normal state in which you will be ready for a serious conversation with your wife. It is better if it takes place on a neutral ground, which will help you avoid violent disagreements and excessive emotionalism of communication.

How to Forgive Someone Who Cheated on You?

• Find out the circumstances, causes, and motives of infidelity. It hurts, but it is necessary to develop a general plan for the elimination of the problems, weak points of your family life. It may be worthwhile to work out a certain charter, a contract, an agreement on the rules of living together, taking into account the positions of both parties.
• Find out what your partner thinks about their infidelity, assess the situation from their perspective.
• Directly ask if a woman is ready to drastically change her ways, start a life from a new chapter, work hard on herself and your marriage.

Here’s an important thing to consider if you don’t know how to trust again after being cheated on. Family bonds can be easily destroyed, and to restore them, it will take time and common efforts, a lot of joint work. Forgiveness comes slowly, gradually. You should not rely on the advice and recommendations of friends, try to shift a part of the responsibility for your own decision onto them, to share your pain. It is for you to decide whether to forgive an act of cheating or end a relationship, no one else.